Between Stimulus and Response

“Between stimulus and response there is a space.
In that space is our power to choose our response.
In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
— Viktor Frankl

Creating More Space in the Pause

Sometimes the difference between reacting and responding is just one mindful breath.
The pause doesn’t erase emotion—it expands our capacity to meet it with presence, curiosity, and care.

Ways to Widen the Space

1. Take one conscious breath.
Feel the inhale, the exhale. Notice your body arriving in this moment.

2. Name what’s here.
Simply say to yourself: “I’m noticing tension,” or “There’s a wave of sadness.” Naming brings awareness to the forefront.

3. Find the feeling in your body.
Where do you sense this reaction? Place a hand there. Breathe into it without needing it to change.

4. Ground through your senses.
Notice one thing you can see, hear, feel, and smell. Presence anchors the nervous system.

5. Add a small movement.
Unclench your jaw, roll your shoulders, stretch your fingers open. Let the body exhale what it’s holding.

6. Delay the response.
Try: “I need a moment,” or “I’ll circle back.” Space gives clarity room to speak.

7. Practice mindfulness of the gap.
Pause before answering your phone, stepping into a room, or taking a bite. Let those tiny pauses remind you that you always have choice.

8. Check your nervous system state.
Am I in fight, flight, freeze, or fawn? If so, regulate first—breathe, walk, or shake it out.

9. Orient to safety.
Look around the room. Let your eyes land on something calm or beautiful. Feel your body soften in response.

10. Write before reacting.
If you’re charged, draft your message but don’t send it yet. Revisit it when you’re steady.

11. Return to your anchor.
Meditation, breathwork, nature, music, stillness—whatever roots you. Build rituals that make the pause familiar.

12. Reflect afterward.
When reactivity happens (and it will), look back gently. Where was the moment of choice? What did you need there?